When you work in marketing, the all-seeing omnipotent eye that is God… sorry, Google…. can be a vital tool. How many people are visiting your website, when, where are they based…. you get the picture. But Google Adwords has one great feature – it tells you the actual search term put in to Google that led someone to your site.
Now, this can be quite fascinating. At a previous job where it was ‘all things upholstery’ you’d get some intriguing visitors to the site. Somehow you just knew that the gimp they were looking for wasn’t the gimp they had found. Nor was the caning instruction DVD, the rest of the terms used suggested they weren’t looking to make a nice chair.
But every now and then a search term just makes you stop and stare. And that happened to me, today…
I was checking the terms, as I do religiously (after all, the omnipotent one is watching) at least once a fortnight, when the following search term, and I have put it in exactly as it appeared, made to stop in my tracks. ‘Paranormal noise in a meat packing room’. Now, can you see why I am intrigued?
It opens up so many questions. Is there a meat packer out there who is being haunted by the evil ghost of the meat packer of Christmas past? Is there a meat-packing facility that is genuinely haunted by some other evil entity? Or – as I’d like to think – are the dead animals coming back to haunt us?
Is there a meat production facility out there where the workers are hearing ghostly mooos in the dead of night, eerie baaaaas as they butcher a lamb carcass? Perhaps even more intriguingly it was Hallowe’en when this search term was used. Is that where the ghosts and spirits of the dead meet with the devil? In a meat factory?
This is surely one for the Most Haunted team? Yvette Fielding screaming in the dark behind a dead cow swinging ominously from a hook while Derek Acorah wanders aimlessly saying ‘I’m seeing grass. There’s some connection with grass. And fields. Definitely grass and fields. And I think this animal was killed….’
MARK LINGARD, MARKETING